Monday, December 31, 2012

Between Man and Angels

The gemara (Shabbos 88b-89a) relates a fascinating event that happened when Moshe ascended to heaven to receive the Torah.

The angels protested the giving of this valuable treasure that had been hidden for nearly 1000 generations prior to Creation to a flesh and blood man, "born of woman". God instructs Moshe himself to address their claim, at which point he grasps the Throne of Glory and proceeds to respond to their criticism. Using the Ten Commandments as his template, Moshe proceeds to demonstrate that the Torah is specifically designed for humans who are capable of exercising free will and must contend with all the challenges of being human. At this point the angels are mollified, and not only do they ally themselves with him, but they also provide Moshe with gifts; the Angel of Death himself shares the secret of the incense and its life-restoring qualities.

In Nefesh HaChaim, Reb Chaim of Volozhin examines the difference between humans and angels. It's not so much that humans are greater than angels - on the contrary, in all respects but one, angels are far superior to humans in terms of inherent holiness, purity, and the like. However, the angel is limited in one aspect that the human is not: the potential to affect other realms with his actions, and have an impact beyond the immediate surroundings.

The angel is described as stationary; its appearance gives off the impression of a single leg, i.e. the inability to move. However, man is described as a composite, a microcosm of all the different worlds beyond that of our  physical plane of existence; he is termed a mehalech - a walker (related to the reason why the corpus of Jewish law is called halacha). Everything he does has an effect that endures forever, and has far reaching ramifications. As we see in this week's parsha, Moshe "[T]urned this way and that and saw that there was no man..." (Ex. 2:12); this is explained as Moshe utilizing ruach haKodesh to determine that no future converts would come from this Egyptian before killing him.

This singularly human ability accords us with a tremendous amount of responsibility. The realization that our decisions and actions have enduring repercussions that stems from our development as creatures of action and flux may no doubt create a certain amount of existential angst. But that is no reason to shy away from our duties while we are here on Earth. There is no way to avoid it; even our inaction has serious causal effect on future generations (sometimes by cutting off the continued growth of our descendants, God forbid).

Of late, there has been a movement toward a more positively-oriented perspective in psychology, built around a pursuit of happiness. Many philosophically minded psychologists have attempted to define what happiness is and how it is attained. Concurrently, they have devised many practical interventions toward this end of cultivating happiness - many of which have tremendous benefits for those who take the time and care to implement them properly. This is a very good step in the right direction; after all, the Ba'al Shem Tov and others stressed the importance of serving HaShem with joy, a concept that should be a basic tenet of Judaism but somehow gets lost in translation sometimes (in fact, it is biblical in nature - "...tachat asher lo avadeta et HaShem b'simcha").

But many of these scholars lose sight of the main goal, seeing happiness as an end in itself. Happiness is a subjective concept that can prove elusive when placed as a desired achievement. A corollary of this attitude is the mistaken notion that pain or discomfort is unhelpful, unwanted, unnecessary; conflict is something that should be avoided as much as possible. This is not the case. The existential struggles and tests that we must go through are what galvanize us to continue, to grow, to keep moving and improving. They give us a sense of responsibility to others as well as ourselves. Frankl called this a "will to meaning"; the Torah itself asserts that "man is born to toil". Only through hard work and dedication is it possible to truly achieve anything in life - and when we feel that we are working for something important, the satisfaction and self assurance is more valuable than any other type of happiness.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

...and the kitchen sink, too.

My wonderful children don't really have a concept of seasonal time yet, so they're more than willing to listen to holiday-related tapes at random times throughout the year. Favorites are timeless, I guess.

Thankfully, some of their favorites include tapes I listened to as a child, including Cleveland's very own Torahvision series' The Purim Story. A classic, my kids are always up for another listen - case in point, this morning.

Listening with half an ear reminded me of a story I heard involving Rav Yitzchak Hutner OBM. One summer, Rav Hutner and his wife went up to Camp Morris (the summer camp affiliated with Yeshivas Chaim Berlin) to visit for a Shabbos. On Sunday morning, the couple came to the dining room following shacharis for breakfast.

Eager to please, the waiter charged with catering to the Hutners asked them what they wanted for breakfast. When Rav Hutner asked what they had, he launched into a litany of dishes, rattling off with breathtaking speed a menu that boasted hardboiled, softboiled, fried, scrambled, sunnyside up and poached eggs; belgian and regular waffles, french toast, pancakes; freshly squeezed orange juice, brewed or instant coffee, hot cereal like oatmeal and farina, or any choice of various cold cereals. Bagels, rye bread, white bread served plain or toasted with jam, mergarine, or butter - anything the Hutners wanted could be provided.

Rav Hutner - who was known for his wit as well as his size - smiled at the waiter, leaned back in his chair. Placing both hands on his stomach, he sang with the trop of the megilla: "Al tapel davar m'kol asher dibarta! And do not leave out anything from which you mentioned!" (Esther 6:10)

Thursday, December 27, 2012

Brain teaser...

A glorious "no prize" for anyone who can come up with the solution to this riddle:

How is it possible to speak for a minute straight without ever using the letter "A"?

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

The Imperative of Chanuka

Words of encouragement and exhortation from the Lubavitcher Rebbe OBM...

And a contemporary tzaddik, the Tolna Rebbe of Jerusalem, at the first night's lighting this year:

Anyone with a yiddish translation would be welcomed...

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Holy Incandescence

We are not always fit for elevated spiritual experiences.  Those many instances that lack any elevated illumination are to be dedicated to exoteric Torah learning and practical service of God. 
But when the light of our soul bursts forth, we must immediately give that light its freedom, so that we may unfold, visualize, imagine, grow wise and attain, aspire and yearn to the highest heights, to the source of our root, to the life of our soul, to the light of the life of the soul of all universes, to the light of the supernal God, to His goodness and beauty.Rav Kook, Orot Hakodesh 10:2
Much as we would like our lives to be more peaks than valleys, and indeed we can strive toward that goal of   allowing our souls to flourish and expand into the world, we have to know how to stay well grounded as well and utilize our time wisely in the interim. But like Reb Kalonymos Kalman says in many places: once the "doors to the prison" are open and we have that time - we should make the most of our visitation!

Chanukah is one of those times when the light of the Torah sheBa'al Peh shines forth. Everything about Chanukah is so very deep, deeper than words can ever describe. As the only yom tov that was established after the redaction of the Torah sheb'Ktav, Chanukah is the one holiday that is tailored for us here in exile, so far from where we once were and yet getting closer with every passing day.

May the light of Chanukah spread out and illuminate the world with the light of Moshiach permanently this time!

Thursday, December 6, 2012

8th Day/ Kids of Courage

The 8th Day is one of those few bands that has universal appeal in my family; their albums are on regular rotation here...

A sweet video for an important cause...

Monday, December 3, 2012

Sale at Kehot Online!

In  honor of 19 & 20 Kislev, the folks at Kehot Online are making a massive sale, up to 40% off their inventory. I've been waiting for this sale since the summer after reading Rabbi Benzion Twerski's essay in Klal Perspectives where he mentions a sefer he has been learning, Lilmod Eich L'Hitpallel...

Check out the sale - there's something for everyone, and it's continuing today and tomorrow!

It's Close To You

L'kavod Yud Tes Kislev.

An unsettling experience: I didn't realize this morning that it was Yat Kislev until my chavruta reminded me. This is my first year completely out of the yeshiva environment, and it's a timely lesson that I have to take steps to ensure that things don't just slip by when I'm not paying attention.

I wish I had seen this a few weeks ago...

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Interesting research

We've touched upon similar ideas presented in this article when discussing some of Reb Kalonymous Kalman's advice. Similarly, the author of Bilvavi Mishkan Evneh mentions a very specific technique that seems to be in line with this research, among other Torah sources...

Bothered by Negative, Unwanted Thoughts? Just Throw Them Away - Association for Psychological Science

(please be advised that the findings appear to be preliminary)

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Just Cause

I've been mulling over a new thought I saw this week in Ohr Gedalyahu, who quotes the Medrash Tanchuma that Yaakov's departure from the Holy Land was an aspect of exile (Yaakov's "taking" the birthright effectively severed Esav's spiritual life. One who cuts a life short - albeit unintentionally - must go into exile).

Within the context of this idea, Rav Schorr refers to the fact that the exile was essentially a decree from our forefather Avraham; at the bris bein habesarim it was established that Avraham's decendents would be exiles, wandering from country to country. Nevertheless, although a decree may be set for generations, in every generation there must be some sort of pretense to "warrant" the decree, no matter how tenuous. Case in point, the birthright in last week's parsha.

I'm not sure I understand this correctly. This idea of needing a "siba" as Rav Schorr puts it is intriguing; it seems like one of those many instances where God plays by "the rules" of our finite human intellect; we (humans) look for causality, and it would seem "unjust" for Him to visit upon one's progeny hardship apropos of nothing, so He finds something to hang it on.

But why? This cannot be the only reason (if it applies at all), because what happened to "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My way..."? The Holy One answers to no one, nor can anyone really question him. Is there a deeper insight in this concept of finding a pretense?

Any thoughts are appreciated.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Monday, November 12, 2012

Follow Up... the last post:

My father, he should live and be well, offered the following insight gleaned from the teachings of Rav Schwab and Rav Pam: the Torah is teaching us the ideal role of the shadchan in terms of how he (or she) should perceive himself and his role in the process of making the match. From the fact that Eliezer's name is not mentioned in the Parsha at all, we learn that vis-a-vis the prospective match, there can be no personal interest on the matchmaker's part at all. There must be an abnegation of sorts, with the matchmaker dedicated to the singular task of bringing this couple together without any ulterior motives (no matter how admirable). It is straight advocacy for the others, free of any self serving motive.

As to why he's alternately referred to as Eved and Ish, I still don't have any answer. My initial hypothesis that the distinction is when Eliezer exercises his autonomy (i.e. when he's carrying out the mission of Avraham, he is in his capacity of servant, and when he must make his own calls in the field, he becomes a Man) such as conversing with Lavan and Besuel fell through; first of all, the verses do not reflect that, and the  commentators make a point of asserting that especially when Eliezer used his own initiative it was in his role as a loyal servant.

After going through it again Shabbos morning, I realized that the Torah specifically calls Eliezer a "man" during his interactions with Rivka - even after Rivka announces his arrival (again calling him a "man") to her family, once he reveals his identity, the Torah reverts to his title of servant.

Perhaps we can suggest an answer that works on two levels: according to the simple meaning, maybe Rivka didn't recognize him as a servant, and innocently referred to him as a free individual - the Torah would reflect that assumption until the confusion is cleared when Eliezer introduces himself. On a deeper level, maybe we can say that the Torah is teaching us an additional quality of Rivka: that same chesed that she extended to Eliezer and his entourage in deed was also present in her attitude towards people. Despite the fact that Eliezer was a servant - in many places, likely considered a second-class citizen - she regarded him as a person, as a human being worthy of being treated as such. So long as she interacts with him, and accords him respect and dignity, he is a man. And Eliezer recognizes this, but still maintains that above all else, he is a loyal servant to Avraham.

As far as I know, this is totally my own, and if it's totally off, please let me know. If it is corroborated somewhere, also please let me know...

Friday, November 9, 2012

Looking for resources...

...about how the Torah does not mention Eliezer by name at all throughout this week's parsha. Also for any significance in terms of the alternating uses of "the Man" and "the Slave/Servant".

A matter of Time

An hour-long segment about time. Although it's not a Jewish program, there's a lot of rich material in this show to ponder, especially as we enter into Shabbos Kodesh...

This hour of Radiolab, we try our hand at unlocking the mysteries of time.
Jorge Luis Borges wrote, "Time is the substance from which I am made. Time is a river which carries me along, but I am the river; it is a tiger that devours me, but I am the tiger; it is a fire that consumes me, but I am the fire." And it’s still as close a definition as we have. We stretch and bend time, wrestle with its subjective nature, and wrap our minds around strategies to standardize it...stopping along the way at a 19th-century railroad station in Ohio, a track meet, and a Beethoven concert.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

The value of modest speech.

There is something to be said about not saying some things. - Me

Two days ago I came across a gemara that I find pertinent in this day and age.

The gemara (TB Shabbos 33a) goes through several sins and their commensurate punishments. Regarding vulgar speech there is a statement that when someone goes to the trouble of explicitly stating the obvious (the gemara uses the example of a bride approaching the wedding canopy; everyone *knows* what follows, yet it is not a topic of conversation - no one points it out. But the one who makes a point of saying something...) it can overturn whatever positive reward he has accrued for the next seventy years.

This is such a timely message for our generation. We live in a world that is increasingly bolder - we tend to become impatient with euphemisms and "beating around the bush". "Just call a spade a spade!" "I have to tell it like it is," and so on. Our society believes that there is more merit to having full disclosure than expressing things in a demure fashion.

This affects relationships as well: "get it out, or it will fester inside you!" While I certainly advocate clear communication, it has to be done properly; just saying things as they pop into one's head is a way to ensure that the chasm widens.

I had a professor in undergraduate who made a point of using profanity (the "seven deadly words", and then some) in class, because it "said it best".

This is one of the things that I believe has contributed to the dumbing down of the media. I have witnessed an increasing usage of lowbrow language in formerly respectable magazines, as a younger generation of "journalists" have entered the fray. It gets worse with online media - and the biggest tragedy to me is the tremendous amount of "culturally Jewish" content that puts out coarse, disgusting (and poorly written) material out into cyberspace. It doesn't make you look hip or advant-garde, only inarticulate and immature.

But this blog is about positivity and increasing light, so I will try and do my part to produce worthy reading...

Also, an earlier daf of gemara has me singing one of my favorite songs:

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Rebbe Shlomo on the Satmar Rav

Lest you think that I forgot it was also (actually, first) Rebbe Shlomo's yahrtzeit week...

Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan on Shema

An audio posted to YouTube with an excerpt from Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan's Jewish Meditation.

Embedding was disabled, so you'll have to follow the link to hear it.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Rav Elazar Menachem Man Shach OBM

I've been saving this for today, the 16th of Mar Cheshvan, Rav Elazar Menachem Man Shach's yahrtzeit. I read it this year in Song of Teshuvah by Rav Moshe Weinberger:

There was a Chassidic Jew in Bnei Brak who had lost everything during WWII and was spiritually broken. One day he came to pour his heart out to Rav Menachem Man Shach, who was not at all Chassidic, but who understood full well the pain of a broken Chassidic heart.This Jew told what had happened to him and said, “I cannot even pray anymore.”Rav Shach said, “What Chassidic group do you belong to?”The man told him, and Rav Shach began to hum a niggun, a tune, from that group. The Chassid closed his eyes and hummed the niggun together with Rav Shach, until he started to cry. 
Rav Shach said, “For a Chassid, it’s not enough to sing a niggun. We have to dance.” So Rav Shach stood up and danced with this Jew for a long time.Afterwards this Jew could pray again. Rav Shach did not give him a theological explanation about where God was during the Holocaust. 
He knew that this niggun was still inside that Jew, hidden underneath the pile of ashes from Auschwitz.
A lot of people presume to know the mind of this gadol, not to mention that they seek to question his status of a gadol to begin with. I cannot honestly say that I understand him, and there are many things that I do not understand about his positions on many issues.

 But one comment that his son Dr. Ephraim Shach made about finally realizing that Rav Shach's entire worldview was through the prism of Torah sheds some light:

"חזרתי לדבר איתו אחרי שנה, אבל להבין את הצד שלו הבנתי רק ב-71', כשאבא שכב בבית החולים תל-השומר. גילו אצלו סרטן והוא עמד בפני ניתוח. פתאום הוא אמר לי שהוא רוצה שאקח אותו חזרה הביתה, כי אין לו בבית החולים אפשרות ללמוד כמו בבית. אז הבנתי שאין מה לעשות – לימוד תורה קודם אצלו לכול, גם  לבריאות שלו                                                                                                                                 
I started speaking to him again a year after [Mother's death], but I only understood his position in '71, when Father was hospitalized in Tel HaShomer. He was diagnosed with cancer, waiting to be operated on. Suddenly he told me he wanted me to take him home, because he couldn't learn in the hospital the way he could at home. Then I understood that there was nothing to do - learning Torah came before everything for him, even his own health.
 Many might shake their heads in a mixture of astonishment and incredulity; how can we possibly relate to that level of commitment? Some might even criticize that single-minded dedication to one element - after all, doesn't it say v'chai bahem, that we are meant to live by the Torah which includes taking care of ourselves?

Perhaps the answer is "yes" - certainly for us down here dealing with all of our nisyonot. Perhaps one can say that this might have been Rav Shach's nisayon. Perhaps, but I don't think we can say one way or another, and we should look at his life as an example of what our lives could look like if we strove to have that same level of dedication. At the end of the day, the stories of his "meshugass" (I shudder at phrasing it that way, but it's for the sake of making a point) in contrast to our own craziness...? I know which one I would prefer to have.

There is a lot more to say about this topic and the general problem I see with our (and I include myself in this) hubris in assuming that we're on any similar level with certain individuals. That we have the gall to say "I disagree with Rav _______" on a given subject that we maybe have some familiarity with, and certainly not the specific details or cheshbonot involved in a specific discussion is a sign of real unprecedented chutzpah.

I believe that one source of this problem is the proliferation of media that enables everybody to espouse his unsolicited opinion on any topic under the sun*. This use to happen in the mikvah and at kiddush clubs and around the water cooler on a regular basis; it's not a new phenomenon that one fellow who has the right amount of charisma, bluster, and confidence can hold forth on any subject to his rapt audience, of course. But now it has become global and more vocal, and these people find reinforcement among like-minded individuals, so it becomes a self-perpetuating problem to a dangerously larger degree.

Sorry about the rant, but a comment from last year's post set this off.

* yes, I caught the irony. It goes without saying that I am guilty as charged, I think.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

A recent post by Rabbi Mordechai Torczyner reminded me of a great story:

There was a young student who one day began contemplating the conundrum of Divine Foreknowledge versus Free Will. The more he thought about it. the more distressed he became - after all, how was it possible that he could have any choice at all, if God supposedly knows everything that will happen, as a matter of fact, makes it happen?

Unable to wrap his head around this ages-old paradox, he began slipping in his faith in an omniscient God. "If we have free will," he reasoned, "then God must not really know what our thoughts are. But if that's the case, then can God really be all that powerful?" His friends and relatives saw how this preoccupation was affecting the youth, and so they suggested that he go see Reb Pinchas of Koretz, the chasidic master, and pose the question to him: Does God know what Man thinks?

After a long trip, the young man - not one prone to visiting those of the chasidic persuasion - reached Reb Pinchas' home. When he entered the study Reb Pinchas was learning Torah, and he looked up at the student with his penetrating gaze. "Reb Yid!" exclaimed Reb Pinchas, "if I can tell what you're thinking, wouldn't you agree that the Holy One, Blessed Is He can obviously do the same?"

Creativity flourishes

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Soul Geology

In the Earth, there are so many wonderful treasures. And if you know where to dig, you will find gold, diamonds, jewelry, all kinds of treasures. 
But if you don't know where to dig, all you will find is rocks and dirt. 
The Rebbe is the geologist of the soul; he can show you where to dig, and what to dig for - but the digging you must do yourself. 
Intro/Outro sample on Searching from Matisyahu's Spark Seeker. 

I think that the sample is taken from a lecture given by Rabbi J. Immanuel Schochet, who develops this concept in Chasidic Dimensions.

Free shiur from Rav Moshe Weinberger

From this past motzei Shabbos at the hilulla of Rav Kalonymos Kalman Shapira, the Piaseczna Rebbe zt"l hy"d. Unfortunately I couldn't make it, as I was spending time with my father and his siblings at the shiva for my grandfather A"H.

Here's the link for the shiur; I haven't listened to it yet, but I'm sure it will be great! For thousands of other shiurim on the Rebbe's works, and on countless other topics that run the gamut of Torah, visit, where a new(-ish) subscription plan allots fifty credits per month for only $6.99, with no obligations.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012


Reb Ally's yeshiva now has a website, where one can learn more information about the yeshiva's goals and aspirations.

Check it out!

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Quick Update

I didn't realize how long it's been since I updated anything to the blog. Things have been super hectic here, and while we're still trying to hold on to that spiritual infusion we got over the past few weeks, our lives in the alma d'shikra continue.

A lot has been going on lately, a lot of new changes and adjustments - some good, some less apparently so.

At the risk of being the bearer of bad news, my grandfather (my father's father) passed away this morning, and I have been mulling over what I would like to share about him. I plan on doing so at a later date (in the near future), but as it is currently Rosh Chodesh, we are not supposed to eulogize and the temptation would be too great. Please check in later this week for something more.

Besurot tovot.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

An essay on Teshuva

Originally appearing in the books Deep Calling Unto Deep and To Touch the Divine, this essay by Rabbi Dr J. Immanuel Schochet is a worthy read for this time of year, especially tonight and tomorrow.

Anyone who has been learning Rav Kook's Orot HaTeshuvah will greatly appreciate much of the material presented here, and Rabbi Schochet's writing style is scholarly and comprehensive without being heavy handed. Everything progresses like a nachal novea here, and it was a pleasure to read.

Rabbi Schochet is an authority on chassidut, in particular that of ChaBaD; he has written numerous books and articles about all matters concerning chassidut including a fantastic biography of the Maggid of Mezeritch. Enjoy the article, brought to you from

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The Dynamics Of Teshuvah

"Rebbe, I am a sinner. I would like to return, to do teshuvah!"
Rabbi Israel of Ryzhin looked at the man before him. He did not understand what the man wanted. "So why don't you do teshuvah?"
"Rebbe, I do not know how!"
R. Israel retorted: "How did you know to sin?"
The remorseful sinner answered simply. "I acted, and then I realized that I had sinned."
"Well," said the Rebbe, "the same applies to teshuvah, repent and the rest will follow of itself!"
Torah: The Ground Rules
Revelation is the foundation of religion. Revelation constitutes the basic premises of religion:
(a) There is the Revealer. G-d exists. He is real.
(b) G-d speaks to man. G-d not only exists, He also cares. He is a personal G-d.
There is hashgachah (Divine Providence). Because G-d cares, like a loving and concerned parent cares for his child, He reveals to us what we should know about reality. He guides us and teaches us the way wherein we are to walk and the acts that we must do.
This is Torah, the "Tree of Life to those who hold fast to it." G-d's word, the Revelation, is called Torah. For Torah means instruction: It instructs and reveals that which was hidden, unknown. It teaches man to walk in the right path. It counsels him how to return to his Master. Revelation, the Torah in all its immensity of 248 commandments and 365 prohibitions, is realistic. It is not alien to man and physical reality. It is not superimposed from without.
It is not hidden from you nor far off. It is not in the heavens that you should say: Who shall go up for us to the heavens? Neither is it beyond the sea that you should say, Who shall go over the sea for us? It is very close to you, in your mouth and in your heart that you may do it (Deuteronomy 30:11-14).
Torah is not attached to the world. It precedes and transcends the world. It is the blueprint for Creation. "The Holy One, blessed be He, looked into the Torah and created the world" (Zohar II:161a).
The universe, man, all that exists, was created, fashioned and made on the basis of, and suited to, the contents and requirements of Torah. This allows for the possibility, and thus the demand, that man- every one of us - can live up to the obligations and ideals of Torah. (As our sages tell us "The Holy One, blessed be He, does not impose burdensome precepts upon His creatures; He comes to man according to his own strength .. according to the ability of each individual").
We are bound up with Torah in a reciprocal relationship. As Torah is the blueprint for the universe, the universe reflects all components of Torah. And as it is with the macrocosm, so it is with the microcosm, with man. The human body and the human soul reflect the 613 precepts: 248 organs corresponding to the 248 commandments; 365 veins corresponding to the 365 prohibitions.
Observance of the positive precepts animates the relative organs, attaches them to Divinity and elicits for them Divine illumination, vitality and energy. Observance of the prohibitions protects the relative veins and vessels against contamination, against influences alien to their nature and purpose.
The Nature of Sin
Revelation, Torah, the life based upon it, constitutes morality, virtue, goodness.
What constitutes sin?
On the simple level, sin means breaking the law, violating the Torah by acts of omission or commission. Our duties are spelled out clearly. The law is defined. To ignore the letter or the spirit of the law, let alone to contravene it, that is sin.
On a deeper level, the meaning of sin is indicated in its Hebrew terminology. The general term for it is aveirah. It is of the root avar - to pass or cross over, to pass beyond. Aveirah means a trespass, a transgression, a stepping across the limits and boundaries of propriety to the "other side."
More specific words are chet, aavon, pesha. Chet is of a root meaning to miss, to bear a loss. Aavon is of a root meaning to bend, twist, pervert.Pesha is of a root meaning to rebel. Technically, legalistically, chet refers to inadvertent sins; aavon to conscious misdeeds; and pesha to malicious acts of rebellion.
Sin, thus, is a move away from Divinity, away from truth. "Your sins separate you from your G-d" (Isaiah 59:2) who is truly "your life." It separates us from Torah, our lifeline, that which attaches us to the source of our life and all blessings.
To neglect the commandments is to deprive ourselves of the illumination and vitality which their observance draws upon us, to forfeit an opportunity, to render ourselves deficient: chata'im, at a loss. To violate the prohibitions is to defile the body, to blemish the soul, to cause evil to become attached.
Sin offers man temporary gains, but it is altogether irrational, self-defeating. Attractive and sweet at the outset, but bitter in the end. Thus, "The Holy One, blessed be He, and the Torah are astounded: How is it possible that a person will sin?!" (Zohar III:13b and 16a)
Thus our Sages teach "No person will commit a sin unless a spirit of folly has entered into him." Sin is an act of ignorance or foolishness. Invariably it can be traced to lack of knowledge, to negligence or carelessness. If premeditated, let alone an act of willful rebellion, it is outright stupidity. Either way, it is rooted in heedlessness, in shortsightedness, in failure to think. It follows upon a blinding obsession with the here and now, egocentricity, self-righteousness.
The Principle of Teshuvah
The folly of sin derives from man's physical nature.
What is man? A composite of body and soul.
The soul is spiritual. By its very nature it reaches out to, and strives for, spirituality.
The body is material, and thus attracted to the allurements of its own elements, of matter.
Yet these two are combined. The soul is removed from its "supernal peak" to be vested in the lowly body.
This "descent" is for the purpose of an "ascent": to elevate and sublimate the physicality of the body and the matter to which it is related in its lifetime. There is tension between body and soul, between matter (and the natural or animalistic life-force that animates and sustains it), and the neshamah, the sublime soul and spirit of man. But they are not irreconcilable.
The body per se is neither evil nor impure. It is potentiality: not-yet-holy, even as it is not-yet-profane. Man's actions, the actions and behavior of the body-soul compound, determine its fall into the chambers of defilement or its ascent to be absorbed in holiness.
To succeed in elevating and sublimating the body and its share in this world is an elevation for the soul as well. It is precisely the exposure to temptation, the risks of worldliness, the possibility of alternatives and the incumbent free will of man, that allow for achievement, for ultimate self-realization.
"The body of man is a wick, and the light (soul) is kindled above it......"The light on a man's head must have oil, that is, good deeds" (Zohar III:187a).
The wick by itself is useless if not lit. The flame cannot burn in a vacuum; it cannot produce light nor cling to the wick without oil. Torah and mitzvot, good deeds, unite the wick and the flame, the body and the soul, to actualize inherent potentiality, to produce a meaningful entity.
The neshamah, the soul, a spark of G-dliness within us, fills us with practically unlimited potential. Man is granted the power to make of himself whatever he likes, in effect to determine his destiny.
The veracity of mundane temptation, however, is no less real. "Sin crouches at the door" (Genesis 4:7). Torah confronts this fact: "There is no man so righteous on earth that he does good and never sins" (Ecclesiastes 7:20).
If sin was final, the history of mankind would have begun and ended withAdam. The Creator took this into account. The original intent was to create the world on the basis of strict justice. As G-d foresaw that such a world could not endure, He caused the attribute of mercy to precede the attribute of justice and allied them.
"When the Holy One, blessed be He, created the world, He consulted the Torah about creating man. She said to Him: 'The man You want to create will sin before You, he will provoke You to anger. If you will deal with him commensurate to his deeds, neither the world nor man will be able to exist before you!' G-d then replied to the Torah: 'Is it for nothing that I am called the Compassionate and Gracious G-d, long-suffering?'"
Thus, before creating the world, the Holy One, blessed be He, created teshuvah (repentance), and said to it: "I am about to create man in the world, but on condition that when they turn to you because of their sins, you shall be ready to erase their sins and to atone for them!"
Teshuvah thus is forever close at hand, and when man returns from his sins, this teshuvah returns to the Holy One, blessed be He, and He atones for all - all judgments are suppressed and sweetened, and man is purified from his sins. How is he purified from his sins? By ascending with this teshuvah in proper manner. Rabbi Isaac said: When he returns before the Supreme King and prays from the depths of his heart, as it is written: "From the depths I call unto You, oh G-d!"
Torah, the rules and regulations for life, preceded the world and served as its blueprint. These rules demand strict adherence. "But for the Torah, heaven and earth cannot endure, as it is said: 'If not for My covenant by day and by night, I had not appointed the ordinances of heaven and earth.'"
Sin means to defeat the purpose of Creation, to deprive creation of all meaning. This must result in the world's reversion to nothingness. Thus the need for the attribute of mercy, of compassion.
Mercy means to recognize the legitimacy of justice, yet to show compassion, to forgive nonetheless. Mercy means to recognize the valid demands of the law, but also to temper these demands by considering the fact that "the drive of man's heart is evil yet from his youth." It offers another chance.
This is the principle of teshuvah.
The Power of Teshuvah
As for the wicked man, if he should return from all his sins that he committed and guard all my decrees, and do justice and righteousness, he shall surely live, he shall not die. All his transgressions which he committed will not be remembered against him....Do I then desire the death of the wicked, says G-d, the Eternal G-d, is it not rather his return from his ways, that he may live?
(Ezekiel 18)
"Teshuvah is a principle indispensable to religion, indispensable to the existence of individuals believing in the Torah. For it is impossible for man not to sin and err - either by erroneously adopting an opinion or moral quality which in truth is not commendable, or else by being overcome by passion and anger. If man were to believe that this fracture can never be remedied, he would persist in his error and perhaps even add to his disobedience.
"The belief in teshuvah, however, leads him to improvement, to come to a state that is better, nearer to perfection, than that which obtained before he sinned. That is why the Torah prescribes many actions that are meant to establish this correct and very useful principle of teshuvah" (Moreh Nevuchim, III:36).
Without teshuvah the world could not endure. Without teshuvah man could not but despair, crushed by the burden of his errors. Torah is the foundation of the universe, it assures and sustains its existence. Teshuvah insures its survival.
The power of teshuvah is overawing. There is absolutely nothing that stands in the way of teshuvah. The thread of teshuvah is woven throughout the whole tapestry of Torah, of our tradition. It is not simply a mitzvah, one of 613 channels to tie us to G-d. It is a general, all-comprehensive principle, the backbone of religion.
There is no sin that cannot be mended and remedied by teshuvah. Teshuvah removes a burdensome past and opens the door to a new future. It means renewal, rebirth. The ba'al teshuvah becomes a different, new, person. It is much more than correction, more than rectification. Teshuvah elevates to a status even higher than the one prior to all sin. Even the perfectly righteous are surpassed by the ba'al teshuvah.
Sin is time-consuming. It is an evolutionary process. Man does not fall at once, suddenly. He is trapped by one wrong act or attitude, often seemingly innocuous, which leads to another. When failing to recognize and stop this process, a chain reaction is set into motion and leads to the mire of evil.
Teshuvah, however, even in the worst of cases, is immediate. "Ba'alei teshuvah are meritorious. For in the span of... one instant they draw close to the Holy One, blessed be He, more so than the perfectly righteous who draw near..... over the span of many years!" (Zohar I:126a-b).
As teshuvah is not part of a gradual process and development, it is not subject to any order, to the "bureaucracy" of a normative procedure. It is a jump, a leap. A momentary decision to tear oneself away. One turn. One thought. And thus it affects even law, justice. The Talmud rules that when someone betrothes a woman on condition that "I am a tzaddik, a righteous person without sin," the betrothal is valid and binding even if he was known to be absolutely wicked. How so? Because at that very moment of proposal he may have meditated teshuvah in his mind!
The single thought, the momentary meditation of teshuvah, is sufficient to move man from the greatest depths to the greatest heights.
Just one thought, indeed; for the essence of teshuvah is in the mind, in the heart. It is a mental decision, an act of consciousness, awareness, commitment.
The Nature of Teshuvah
Where does the enormous potency of teshuvah come from? How can it erase the past, change the present, mold the future - recreate, as it were?
The power of teshuvah derives from its transcendent nature. Like Torah, teshuvah preceded the Creation. It is not part of the world, of Creation, of a creative process. It is beyond time, beyond space, rooted in infinity. In the sphere of infinity, past and present fade into oblivion.
Teshuvah is in the heart, in the mind. One thought of teshuvah is enough. For thought, the mind, is not restricted by the limitations of the body. The mind can traverse the universe in seconds. And the mind - machshavah,thought - is man, the essence of man. Man is where his thoughts are.
Fasting, self-mortification, may be means through which man expresses remorse. They may be acts of purification, of self-cleansing. But they do not constitute teshuvah. Teshuvat hamishkal, penance commensurate to the sin, "to balance the scales," is important. So is teshuvat hageder, the voluntary erection of protective "fences" to avoid trespassing. Empirical reality may dictate such modes of behavior corresponding to certain forms of weakness. However, these deal with symptoms only. They relate to specific acts that constitute the external manifestation of sin. They do not touch sin itself. They do not tackle the root and source from which sin grows. That root and source is in the mind, in the heart: ignorance, carelessness, neglect, wrong attitudes, egocentricity, self-justification.
Just as sin is rooted in man's will and mind, so must teshuvah be rooted in man's will and mind. "He who sets his heart on becoming purified (from ritual defilement) becomes pure as soon as he has immersed himself (in the waters of a mikveh), though nothing new has befallen his body. So, too, it is with one who sets his heart on cleansing himself from the impurities that beset man's soul - namely, wrongful thoughts and false convictions: as soon as he consents in his heart to withdraw from those counsels and brings his soul into the waters of reason, he is pure" (Maimonides).
The tragedy of sin is not so much the transgression itself, to succumb to temptation, for "there is no man on earth... that he never sins." The real tragedy, the ultimate sin, is the failure to judge oneself, the failure to do teshuvah, "he has left off to contemplate to do good....does not abhor evil."
Better one self-reproach in the heart of man than numerous lashings. As the bacteria, poisonous and infectious, are eliminated, their symptoms and outgrowths will disappear as well. And as sins cease, sinners will be no more. Thus teshuvah, the teshuvah that deals with the essence of sin, brings healing into the world.
This is not to understate the external symptoms of sin. For with every transgression "man acquires a kateigar, a prosecutor, against himself." The act of sin assumes reality. It clings to man, it attaches itself to him - leading him further astray in this world only to accuse him later in the hereafter.
On the other hand, everything in Creation is categorized in terms of matter and form (body and soul). The act of sin, its external manifestation, is the matter (the body) of sin, which creates the kateigar. The underlying thought, the intent, the will or passion that generated the transgression, is the form (the soul) that animates and sustains that body.
Self-mortification attacks that body and may destroy that matter. But only a change of heart, conscious remorse, is able to confront its form, its soul. Only the elimination of the thought, intent and desire that caused the sin, will eliminate the soul of the kateigar. And when deprived of its soul, thekateigar ceases to exist.
Thus "rend your heart and not your garments, and return unto G-d, your G-d, for He is gracious and compassionate, long-suffering and abounding in kindness....." When rending the heart in teshuvah there is no need to rend one's garments.
The Disposition of the Ba'al Teshuvah
Teshuvah is essentially in the heart, in the mind. It is related to the faculty ofbinah, understanding.
There cannot be teshuvah without a consciousness of reality: understanding what is required. Recognition of one's status. Introspection. Searing soul-searching. Honest self-evaluation that opens the eyes of the mind and causes a profound sense of embarrassment: How could I have acted so foolishly? How could I have been so blind and dumb in the face of the Al-mighty, the Omnipresent "Who in His goodness renews each day, continuously, the work of Creation?" How could I forsake the Ultimate, the Absolute, for some transient illusion? As the prophet laments: "My people have committed two evils: they have forsaken Me, the Fountain of Living Waters, to hew for themselves cisterns, broken cisterns that hold no water!"
Teshuvah is directly related to bushah - shame, embarrassment. The Hebrew word teshuvah contains the letters of boshet; transposing the letters of shuvah (return), offers the word bushah (shame). For bushah is an indication of teshuva.
Bushah, a sense of shame, flows from an illuminating grasp of reality. It is the proof of true regret over, and of a break with, the past. It is identical with teshuvah. To achieve that level is assurance of forgiveness: He who commits a sin and is ashamed of it all his sins are forgiven him!
It takes understanding to do teshuvah: "His heart shall understand, and he will return, and it shall be healed for him." That is why first we pray: "...bestow upon us wisdom, understanding and knowledge," and only then: "bring us back to You in complete teshuvah."
Wisdom, understanding, knowledge, are prerequisites for teshuvah. It takes knowledge to separate right from wrong. Only the wise know to distinguish between holy and profane, between pure and impure. Thus teshuvah is identical with binah.
The ba'al teshuvah becomes aware that sin is a partition between G-d and man. Sin disturbs the balance of the universe, sundering its unity. "He who transgresses the precepts of the Torah causes a defect, as it were, above; a defect below; a defect in himself; a defect to all worlds."
The word teshuvah can be read as tashuv-hey - returning, restoring thehey. For when man sins he causes the letter hey to be removed from the Divine Name. The Divine Name, the manifestation of G-dliness, is no longer whole. The hey has been severed, leaving the other three letters to spell hoy, the Biblical exclamation for woe.
"Woe to them that call evil good, and good evil... woe to them that they are wise in their own eyes..." (Isaiah 5:20).
In turn, "he who does teshuvah causes the hey to be restored... and the redemption depends on this." Teshuvah restores the hey, recompletes the Holy Name, re-establishes unity, frees the soul. "Teshuvah corrects everything - it rectifies above, rectifies below, rectifies the penitent, rectifies the whole universe."
The bushah of teshuvah relates only initially to the past. It develops further into an awareness of personal insignificance in the presence of Divine Majesty. On this higher level it signifies bitul ha-yesh (total self-negation). It diverts one's sights from concern with self to concern with the Ultimate. Thus it ignites a consuming desire to be restored to and absorbed in the Divine Presence: "My soul thirsts for G-d, for the living G-d - when shall I come and be seen in the Presence of G-d..." "Oh G-d, You are my G-d, I seek You earnestly. My soul thirsts for You, my flesh longs for You, in a dry and wary land without water... or Your loving-kindness is better than life..."
This longing of the ba'al teshuvah is more intense than that of the tzaddik, the saint who never sinned. Having been removed from G-dliness, the ba'al teshuvah wants to make up for lost time, for lost opportunities. The energy and passion once expended on nonsense and improprieties are now directed, in ever-increasing measure, towards good. He reaches out with all strength, and thus prompted, leaps to levels unattainable by the tzaddik.
His former transgressions, now responsible for his efforts and achievements, are thus sublimated. His descent, in effect, generated his ascent. The former sins are thus converted into veritable merits.
The status requiring teshuvah is coupled with grief, heart-breaking remorse. The possibility of teshuvah generates hope, faith, confidence: "The heart being firm and certain in G-d that He desires to show kindness, and is gracious and compassionate, generously forgiving the instant one pleads for His forgiveness and atonement. Not the faintest vestige of doubt dilutes this absolute conviction."
Teshuvah is thus marked by great joy as well. Joy is not only a motivating force for the act of teshuvah, but also a necessary result of it. For every step away from sin is a step closer to virtue. Every move away from the darkness of evil is a move closer to the light of goodness, coming ever closer to G-d. This fact must fill the heart with joy, a true and encompassing joy and happiness, even as the lost child rejoices in having found the way home.
Indeed, this deep sense of joy, filling one's whole being, is the very test and proof of sincere teshuvah.
The Universality of Teshuvah
The conventional translation for teshuvah is repentance. This, however, is but one aspect, the aspect related to error, to sins of omission or commission. The literal and real translation is "return."
Return implies a two-fold movement. There is a source of origin from which one moved away and to which one wants to return.
The descent of the soul into this world is a move away. Regardless of the lofty purposes to be achieved, the sublime goals to be attained, the fact remains that it is an exile. For the soul in its pristine state is bound up and absorbed in its source, in the very "bond of life with G-d." From this Place of Glory, the manifest Presence of G-d, the soul is vested in a physical body, related to matter, exposed to and involved with the very antitheses of spirituality, of holiness.
To retain that original identity, to regain that original bond, that is the ultimate meaning of teshuvah. "And the spirit returns unto G-d who gave it."
Teshuvah tata'a, the lower level of teshuvah, is rectification, an erasure of the past. On a higher level, teshuvah is "coming home," a reunion. The child separated and lost, driven to return with a consuming passion, pleads: "It is Your countenance, G-d, that I seek! Do not conceal Your countenance from me!" The innermost point of the heart longs for Divinity so intensely that "his soul is bonded to the love of G-d, continuously enraptured by it like the love-sick whose mind is never free from his passion... and asSolomon expressed allegorically: 'For I am sick with love.'"
This higher sense of teshuvah - teshuvah ila'a, supreme teshuvah -relates to the tzaddik, the faultless, as well.
The Torah is given to all of Israel, to every Jew. Nothing in Torah is superfluous. Nothing in Torah is the exclusive heritage of some only. Everything in Torah speaks to every individual, relates to every one. It is only by way of the whole Torah that anyone can become a whole person. Every mitzvah serves its purpose. Every instruction is directly relevant to the macrocosm of the universe and the microcosm of every man.
Teshuvah is an integral part of Torah. It manifests itself in numerous precepts and instructions. "Every one of the prophets charged the people concerning teshuvah." Teshuvah thus must relate to the righteous, to the saint, no less than to the sinner. Alternatively, the righteous would be missing out on a significant part of Torah. Teshuvah ila'a thus relates to the tzaddik as well.
Teshuvah ila'a reaches where a normative ascent, a behavior that is faultless yet gradual and normative, cannot reach. It moves man to jump, to leap, blinding him to everything but his objective, disregarding all and any obstacles in the pursuit and attainment of the ultimate goal. In this context the tzaddik, too, becomes a ba'al teshuvah, "one possessed of teshuvah," a personification of teshuvah.
Teshuvah ila'a does not mean a withdrawal of man from the world. It reveals G-d in the world: omnipresence in the most literal sense, an encompassing awareness and a penetrating consciousness ofthe reality and presence of G-d. "To cleave unto Him, for He is your life"; "there is nothing else beside Him." There is a total negation of ego, a total submersion of personal will in the Supreme Will. Not two entities brought together, but absorption and union to the point of unity.

"This mitzvah which I command you this day is not beyond your reach nor is it far off..." Generally, this verse refers to the entire Torah. In context with the preceding passage it is also interpreted to refer specifically to the principle of teshuvah. "Even if your outcasts be in the outermost parts of Heaven" and you are under the power of the nations, you can yet return unto G-d and do "according to all that I command you this day." For teshuvah "is not beyond reach nor is it far off," but "it is exceedingly near to you, in your mouth and in your heart to do it."
"One hour of bliss in the World to Come is better than all the life of this world." Yet "one hour of teshuvah and good deeds in this world is better than all the life in the World to Come"
"Well," said the Rebbe, "do teshuvah, and the rest will follow of itself!"

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Prayers Needed!

For Reb Yehuda Aryeh ben Esther Liba, a very close friend who is in serious need of a refua.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

The Avodah of Rosh HaShana

This shiur was delivered last night by Rav Moshe Weinberger; it is available for free at YUTorah, a fantastic repository of Torah and all things Judaism related online.

While you're there, check out the myriads of shiurim from Rav Hershel Schachter, Rav Mordechai Willig, Rabbi Aryeh Lebowitz, our very own Reb Ally, and Rabbi Mordechai Torczyner (of The Rebbetzin's Husband blog), among many others.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Crossing the bridge

It's 2 A.M. and you're driving on the Tappan Zee Bridge in the pouring rain when you get a flat tire. You try to pull out your spare, but you don't know where to go from there. The bridge is swaying in the wind, and it's very dark. You're wet, tired, and hungry, and it seems like you'll never get off this bridge.

All of a sudden, a lone pickup truck pulls up behind your car. The driver gets out, pulls some worn but sturdy tools from his trunk, and proceeds to change the tire in practically no time at all. You thank him profusely; to you, he's an angel sent from Heaven to get you off the bridge. You shake hands, get back in your respective cars, and continue off into the darkness, hopefully towards home. The entire way, you're praising the kindness of a stranger.

Fast forward: a few days later, you're with your family, enjoying some quality time. Your cell phone rings; it's an unfamiliar number. You answer the call to discover that it's the fellow who helped you that dark rainy night on the Tappan Zee. He's calling to check up on you, make sure everything is okay. He asks you if you need any help with anything, or maybe if you want to talk. For some reason, you feel uncomfortable - why is this guy calling you? Sure, he helped you off the bridge when you really needed it, but now his attention just seems odd...eerie, even. 

After all, once you finished relating the story to a few people within the next day, you forgot about the stranger. 

And, you presumed, he forgot about you...

"And that," my newest graduate professor exclaimed triumphantly, "is how you must look at the 'relationship' you share with your patients."

Pacing at the front of the classroom, he waved a bony finger. "I see this all the time - don't get involved. The therapeutic relationship is a farce. It must be so. It is a facsimile, an uncanny resemblance to an authentic relationship, and quite possibly the closest thing to an honest healthy relationship that your client has - or will ever have - experienced. But make no mistake, it is not real." Looking at each one of us in the eye before continuing, he said "When your patient is sitting in front of you, he or she is the only person who exists - but once they leave the room, it must be out of sight, out of mind. And once you have finished the treatment plan, sever all ties!

"There is no relationship, no dyad. You had a job to do and now it's done - you helped him get off the Tappan Zee in the middle of the night, no more, no less."

I appreciate the necessity of maintaining some professional distance; there are legal as well as moral reasons, and an overly involved relationship can quickly become inappropriate and damaging for both individuals involved. But my professor's opinion advocates an approach that flies in the face of why I - and I believe many of my colleagues - got involved in the mental health field in the first place. Of course, we want to help, to make a difference in the lives of people who need understanding and empathy - and this stems from a deep compassion for one's fellow human being, far beyond a utilitarian goal of forming a better functioning society. Certainly as far as Jewish values go, we are exhorted to share in the burden of our suffering brothers and sisters (this is a theme we have visited several times in the past; it is a fundamental element of how the Torah guides our interpersonal dealings, no less).

I hope that I can maintain a balance between my professionalism and my concern, in order to ensure that neither overpowers the other. But I cannot accept the directive to perceive my client as a "consumer" whose only relevance is in the immediate context of the therapy session, give or take a few moments consideration just prior to the meeting and reflection following afterward. If I was treating Jewish patient, for example, how could I not find out their full Hebrew name in order to pray for them? In my eyes, that would be as egregious an oversight as any basic part of the therapeutic process.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Great story about hiddur mitzvah

My New Year’s Resolution – With Strings Attached

“Rabbi, is there any religious requirement for Jewish men to wear mezuzahs around their necks?”

“Rabbi, if you yourself are clean-shaven, why does this inmate claim his Jewish religion prohibits him from using a razor on his face?”

As the rabbi of the Orthodox synagogue in Pennsylvania’s capital city, one of the highlights of my month is a Pennsylvania Department of Corrections meeting I attend. This committee meets monthly to review religious petitions filed by Pennsylvania‘s state prison inmates.

Aside from an opportunity to (sometimes) assist remorseful Jewish inmates, these monthly get-togethers enable me to help others better understand Judaism. In addition, I always learn new details about other cultures and get a chance to interact with a diverse group of people whom I never would have otherwise met.

An incident at a recent meeting made a profound impression on me. Sitting around our conference table were the group leader, a Protestant minister (to represent all Christian groups); an Islamic Imam; me, the rabbi; a Wiccan priestess (to represent all pagan groups); a Native American spiritual leader; a prison security officer (to explain security concerns); a food-service manager (to explain the limitations of the kitchen staffs, as most requests are food-related); a legal expert (to advise the group and help the state avoid lawsuits); and a Corrections Department administrator.

A few days prior to each meeting, the participants are sent the religious accommodation requests to be reviewed. In looking through the cases in advance of that meeting, I noticed a request from an inmate who wanted to be allowed to wear a pair of tzitzis all hours of the day (not just his tallis while praying in the prison’s chapel).

When I began attending these meetings a few years ago, I brought in a new pair of tzitzis for “show and tell” so everyone in the room would understand what I was describing to them when requests such as these came in. Having already introduced the group to tzitzis, I couldn't see any reason to bring in another pair to that day’s meeting.

At this meeting, the group leader introduced me to two new faces in the room – legal interns shadowing the Department of Corrections lawyer during their summer break from law school.

When we arrived at the case of the inmate requesting tzitzis, the group leader turned to me and said, "Rabbi, our two interns have probably never seen a pair of tzitzis before, and have no idea what this request is all about. Would you mind showing them yours?"

When I asked him if he really wanted me to take off my tzitzis, he said, “Yes, it would be great for the interns to fully understand the inmate’s request.”

I loosened my tie and unbuttoned the top two buttons of my shirt. As I began pulling my tzitzis over my head, I whispered a heartfelt prayer to God that the pair of tzitzis I had put on that morning on my way tominyan was the nicest and cleanest pair I owned.

Sure enough, the garment was as clean and white as snow. The tzitzis strings were in great shape and the garment itself was perfectly ironed.

I can't begin to describe the feeling of relief I felt as my clean and ironed pair of tzitzis made their way to the interns while I explained their religious significance to the committee.

Driving home after the meeting, I called my wife, Layala, to tell her I had found yet another reason to appreciate her.

I had always asked Layala not to bother ironing my tzitzis after either of us had washed them. After all, I wear them under my shirt, where no one can see them.

Yet she insists I wear a pair of tzitzis that have been neatly ironed. Why? After crossing the Yam Suf at the height of Yetziyas Mitzrayim, our ancestors sang "Zeh Keili v'anveihu – this is my God and I will glorify Him” (Shemos 15:2). Based on this phrase, our Sages (Shabbos 133b) taught that we should try to serve God in the most beautiful manner we can. Accordingly, Layala feels if I really value the wearing oftzitzis as a mitzvah, I should be sure they are as clean and wrinkle-free as possible.

I told Layala what had occurred at that day’s meeting, and how extremely grateful I was for her devotion to the principle of "Zeh Keili v'anveihu.”

She laughed, and said she learned this from her mother, who always insists on ironing my father-in-law's freshly-washed tzitzis.

I then called my mother-in-law to tell her what had happened and jokingly thanked her for always making it a point to iron my father-in-law's tzitzis.

She laughed and said that for their entire marriage my father-in-law has asked her not to bother ironing his freshly-washed tzitzis. After all, he wears them under his shirt and no one can see them.

For all these years, however, she has insisted my father-in-law wear the cleanest and most wrinkle-free pair of tzitzis possible.

"You see!" she said, "It's a good thing I kept at it!"

I fully agreed.

Will I continue asking my wife not to iron my freshly-washed tzitzis? Absolutely. Ironing my tzitzis is something I’d like to do myself from now on.

Akiva Males is the rabbi of Harrisburg’s Kesher Israel Congregation. He can be reached